GD IS LV... A powerful message for us all.

 

I saw this lovely license plate as GOP's other half and I were driving around town. Forgive the bad image-- you try taking a photo in a moving car at night!

I don't get this kind of proclamation via license plate. God is Love. Wow. Original and clever. Good for you. I hope this driver is some kind of minister, otherwise, is this really the focus of their life? Is this the total summation of their philosophy? 

"God is Love" doesn't make any sense, either. I doubt they're some kind of "spiritual" type person who thinks that Love is God... meaning that love triumphs all evil and that the presence of love and the capacity to love is the closest to godliness that any of us can get. That sort of philosophy I can get on board with. When someone is shocked by my atheism, gasps, and asks, "But what do you BELIEVE in??" I can usually at least placate them by saying that I believe in love.

But I don't think that was the message this SUV driving do-gooder was going after. I'm sure they were trying to tell us that God is all-loving. That he loves unconditionally. Well, no. 

LOVE ME OR I SEND YOU TO HELL! WORSHIP ME ON THE SABBATH OR I SEND YOU TO HELL! In most religions, you have to at least repent at the last second or be "saved" to get into Heaven. That's not really unconditional love.

Even if you belong to a religion like Judaism that doesn't believe in Heaven or Hell... you still have to admit that isn't a very loving god. The Old Testament god is certainly not a loving god, but a vengeful, spiteful, wrath and fury sort of god. Let's not forget my favorite Hollywood temple...

So.... I'm still confused. Who is this god that's all love? Because I have yet to see evidence for it.

WAIT! Unless I'm interpreting this all wrong. Could that license plate actually mean:

God Damn IS L'Heart

Of course! This person isn't religious! They're just emo and have been tortured by love! I totally get it now! Are there some interpretations that I'm missing here?

Some Easy Reading in a Not So Easy World

I've been pretty contemplative and more than a little sad about the Gabrielle Gifford's shooting, and became even more upset today when I read that the suspect was an "ardent atheist" according to an article I just read. It's sad because the media will probably try to spin him and his motives a thousand different ways, but it seems like he wasn't a right-wing nutbag, but just a mentally ill individual. Seems like he was full of conspiracy theories and hated all government. For some reason or other, he became fixated on Rep. Gifford.

Certainly, we'll all be inundated with reports on this shooting, and all I can say is that it's extremely troubling and depressing. So, since I'm a little too sad about the whole thing to say much else on the matter, here's an oldie but goodie... "Advice God" meme from GOP to you.

New Year News

Sorry about the lack of posts for the past two weeks... Work gets cuh-razy during the holidays, plus there was a lot of time spent with family and friends, and I incorrectly believed that I was having a computer crisis. Did you know that if you have an Mac adapter with the wrong wattage (60 vs. 85), it will appear to charge the computer, but won't allow it to start up if it's plugged in? Neither did we! So I spent about 5 days of the holiday sans computer because I incorrectly believed that I was having video card issues again. Silly me!

But here's the New Year News:

God Obscures Perception is getting married!

We've been together over 6 years and became officially engaged in October (on our anniversary). We've debated a lot about the cultural meanings and history of marriage, what it means to the LGBTQ community, and if getting married is the right thing to do. Ultimately, though, we decided that not getting married does not help the gay community achieve that right for themselves. We'll be having a completely non-religious ceremony with some nods to atheism, officiated by our best friend. I didn't post the news any earlier because we didn't want to even think about planning anything until after the New Year. So here we are!

Not that I'm interested in having a wedding remotely inspired by anything on The Knot (but they do have some decent organizing tools that we can use as broad outlines), but can I mention how irritating it was that they do not have an option for an "atheist" or "non-religious" tag for profiles?

I selected "Intercultural" because my parents are very devout Catholics. That's practically like another culture, right? Or would that make it "Interfaith?" At least they have a "Same Sex" option. These options are so limiting! Why bother even giving tags like this?

That's why I love Offbeat Bride. Just doing a search for "atheist" on that page turns up about 40 results. As opposed to the 10 results you get on The Knot, which mostly features different pages of the same 3 threads.

And I don't think you'll find many articles titled "Musings on Feminism and Weddings" on The Knot. While our wedding will probably seem completely irreverent to some, we hope that it will be a thoughtful celebration of our personal commitment to one another and an expression of our appreciation that we are legally allowed to wed and enjoy the benefits of marriage... with our deepest regret that same-sex couples are usually denied this right and our hope that this will change someday soon.

Plus a really great party.

The Story of the Christ Child

At work, I began a discussion about having religious Christmas music playing and whether or not anyone was bothered by it. Generic secular Christmas music certainly doesn't bother me, in fact, I rather enjoy it! Even the religious music doesn't bother me as much. I grew up with it, so I sort of have nostalgic feelings towards it. Although, "Silent Night" and anything specifically referencing a virgin birth is sort of weird to me when it plays in a public place. Like a restaurant. I just think it's a little odd in a restaurant where a decent percentage of our guests are Jewish or non-religious.

Gross. That's just weird.

This led to me telling a story about my best friend in 6th grade whose father was Catholic and her mother Jewish. The family celebrated both Hanukkah and Christmas. Coming from an area with very few Jewish families, my friend and neighbor explained to me the story of Hanukkah and its traditions. However, while the family put up Christmas decorations and exchanged presents on Christmas, my friend had never been to a Catholic church and had absolutely no idea what the Biblical Christmas story was... so I explained it to her.

Now, as I told this story, a co-worker who grew up in a relatively non-religious household confessed that as an adult, he really didn't know the Biblical story either. So, I tried to explain it. And I laughed. It really sounded ridiculous.

An angel tells a teenage girl named Mary that she's going to have a baby! But Mary is a VIRGIN! Mary cons her boyfriend, Joseph, into marrying her so she will be respectable. Joseph calls Mary a lying whore and stomps off. That night, he's visited by an angel in a dream, telling him that Mary is telling the truth. This scares the crap out of Joseph, so he marries the now-pregnant-by-God Mary.

When Mary is uber-pregnant, the couple travels to Bethlehem to pay taxes (or participate in the census, depending on the version). Mary rides on a donkey. Anyway, when they get to Bethlehem, the inns are all booked up, so they end up sleeping in a stable. There, Mary gives birth to Jesus. And a whole boatload of angels show up and sing, probably freaking everybody out.

Meanwhile, a great big star shines overhead, and a bunch of shepherds travel to the stable and pay homage to Jesus. Because some angels told them to do it. OR if you read a different account, some "wise men" see the star, interpret it as a sign, and travel all the way to Bethlehem from who knows where and bring Baby Jesus some useless, but probably valuable gifts.

Wow.  As always, you can count on Wikipedia for plainly spelling out all of the wonderful contradictions that exist in the Bible even for the most simple of stories. I love it. And as an adult, I now get to enjoy the incredulity on the faces of those who grew up in a totally secular environment as I tell the traditional Christian story of Christmas.

But you know the version I like best? The short, but sweet, version told on Pee Wee's Playhouse Christmas Special, our household's favorite holiday movie tradition! It's utterly delightful.

It's the TRUE MEANING of Christmas at 1:20. Thanks for explaining it to me Pee Wee!

Virgin Mary, Mother of Wings...

A little irreverence to brighten your day. 

Source?

Not that I'm a big fan of Hooters OR eating chicken wings, but this kind of thing always makes me laugh. Thanks to the bro for sharing.

And on a similar-ish note, I just watched the first episode of "Extras" with Ricky Gervais and laughed riotously/uncomfortably throughout. Cheers to him for making atheism a major theme of a first episode. The BBC gets away with everything. I can't imagine an American show doing that. I'm looking forward to watching the rest of the series.

God Damn-- I mean... ?

Blasphemy. Doesn't really serve a purpose anymore, does it? I mean, Holy Zeus, am I a hypocrite for acknowledging a god in some small way by damning it?

I'd like to think not. It's just words, after all. It's something made up to help give expression to anger or frustration. Just because I say "fuck" doesn't mean I'm actually talking about sexual intercourse. I don't know much about the etymology of swears, but I sure do enjoy using them. And "god damn" may be one of my favorites... it's a close second to just using "JESUS CHRIST." Sometimes I may or may not give Jesus a middle name that isn't mentioned in the Bible.

I started thinking about this a while back at work when I had the most comical/graceful slipping-and-almost-but-not-quite fall in the middle of the dining room. Someone had spilled olive oil on the floor and my right leg flew out in front of me as my arms windmilled, flailing wildly. I ended up performing something that looked a bit like a ballet move as all the surrounding customers GASPED audibly. Thankfully, my hands were empty at the time. And I shouted,

Source

"JESUS!"

at the top of my lungs. In retrospect, I'm quite pleased with myself for not shouting out something more offensive. I'm lucky that most of our clientele are either gay or Jewish, and likely don't care about such things. My mother is the type of person who takes offense at Valley Girl types saying, "Like, gawd, totally, for sure" too much. To her, even saying, "Oh, god" is using the "lord's name in vain."

If I don't believe in any of these imaginary figures, why do I invoke them when I am most frightened or angry? Old habit? I actually used them less when I was a believer. Or maybe it's just utterly satisfying to abuse the words. They are unbelievably satisfying.

So what? Does this make me a hypocrite? It might take some practice, but I could get used to saying "FSM damn it" or "For the love of INVISIBLE PINK UNICORN!" Sure I could.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Red Kuri Squash for my Thanksgiving Day soup!

I am up ridiculously late because I wanted to prep/cook a lot of vegetarian goodies before tomorrow morning.

This year, I am very grateful that my two older brothers are also atheists. Our sibling Thanksgiving has been a tradition for several years, and I appreciate not having that awkward moment of "grace." Mostly, I will be thankful that I have family close by whenever I need them, and they have been there for me many times. I am thankful that my baby niece is beautiful and happy and healthy and that modern science has made childbirth safer for all women. I am very lucky.

But, then again, I don't believe in luck. I like the term "blessings," but it doesn't really mean anything for me. I guess I could say that I just feel grateful for what I have.

What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving? Science? I sure am. And to live in a country where I'm at least not stoned to death for espousing my views. Thanks, America.

Eat up, everyone!

Guest Post #2: National Exceptionalism and Religion

 Guest Post #2 from our friend Zach. Anyone who wants to submit ANYTHING is welcome! Videos, photos, cartoons... we want it!

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The US really has one export that it has traded on for about the last 150 years that has driven it like no other.  Regardless of what we sell or what we make, the thing we have really been selling since we got to the Pacific is the idea that the United States of America is special.  We have pulled people here in droves, and still do today with the promise that somehow this country, this place, these people here are going to give them a better shot than they had back home.  I will get to the merits of the idea later but right now it's the manifestation of this idea that gives me pause. Every country believes it's special somehow and that's fine.  They wouldn't have developed themselves as a country if they didn't. Where this becomes dangerous is when it's God telling you you're special.  Right now in the world there are three perfect examples of the dangers of God picking one nation over another.

1: Iran.
Iran is considered the world's only theocracy (I don't know why the Vatican isn't considered one but whatever).  President Ahmadinejad is only the head of the government.  The head of state is the Ayatollah Khamenei is the actual leader of the country and NOTHING gets done without his say so.  He had to certify the last contentious elections and Ahmadinejad serves at his pleasure.  Under the theocracy, Iran has alienated the larger international community, taken steps to develop nukes, and oppressed the freedoms of its people and their rights to choose their own leaders.  All unilateral actions taken without regard to the larger world in which they reside because Allah is on their side. 

2: Israel. 
Israel is not technically a religious state.  However, any Jew who steps on their soil is immediately a citizen, and they are preparing legislation right now to force all non-Jews who want citizenship to sign a loyalty oath.  A Christian or Muslim or Atheist born and raised in Jerusalem could potentially lose their citizenship if they didn't sign.  The Jews like to refer to themselves as the chosen people and if that doesn't smack of divine exceptionalism, I really don't know what does.  It is evident even as far as Jews of OTHER nations are concerned:  ex.  I have a very close devout Jewish friend.  We often get into debates about Israel.  In the last one she said something that disturbed me to the point that I have spoken to her little since (to my own discredit).  Debating the flotilla and the "ground Zero Mosque,"  she accused me of anti-semitism and then said that she would "Support Israel whatever they did, because it was the [homeland]."  This girl loves the US and would never show it such blind deference nor should she nor anybody.  This type of support can only be engendered by God and is EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.   

3: Speaking of Extremely Dangerous...The USA. 
Since Manifest Destiny there has been a sense that the US should be an empire.  We quail at calling it that but displacing entire native and colonizing populations in a land grab to take hold of an entire continent really reeks of such an attitude.  Our last president spoke openly of being "Chosen by God" to lead us through the trials we face and Reagan liked to refer to Russians as the "Evil Empire" indicating that we were inherently good.  Conservative with a simple and unexamined view of the Constitution, tend to have an equally simple and unexamined view of the Bible.  What they believe in is God's will and they believe in America. This perspective is dangerous because America doesn't have to do anything to BE exceptional aside from be the place where these people live and can vote Republican. We can claim to be against Torture and Nation building while doing THOSE EXACT THINGS, yet we are the USA and God says we are special.  We can act out of fear and protectionism and seal our borders and kick out all the illegal immigrants without exception (even if they were brought over the border as infants and have never known any other country but ours), but we are the land of opportunity: open the poor, the tired and the huddled masses, because we are the USA and God says we are special.  We can forget the poor and accept a prosperity gospel despite it being EXACTLY the OPPOSITE of what democracy, our country and CHRISTIANITY are founded on, because we are the USA and GOD says we are special.

I believe the US is special. We can provide opportunities. We can welcome all who love peace and we can say whatever we want.  But like it or not we are not alone in these things anymore. We are special because we a nation strong enough to be able to stand by our ideals.  We are powerful enough and brave enough to stand firm and say WE DON'T TORTURE in the face of fear stay fast to that. We are special because we have the power to say WE BELIEVE IN FREEDOM FOR ALL and fight to expand those freedoms at home and abroad. We are special because we have the wealth to say NO ONE SHOULD GO WITHOUT BASIC NEEDS.  And work to pull people out of degradation and poverty. We are special because we have the influence, the wealth, the strength and the avenues in place to lift not just other nations but our own towards ever greater heights.  But if we don't use those exceptional qualities, if we don't constantly strive to be better and less compromising for the good of all.  If we rely on some god to tell us that we're special.  We won't be anymore. 

Honoring Post-Mortem Wishes of the Religious

When the last of your two parents dies, would you (as an atheist), acknowledge their wishes for a religious funeral ceremony? 

My mother asked me this the other day. She's an extremely devout Catholic who's very, very involved with her church. Apparently, the parish priest hosted a free class on Catholic funerals and told a story about a church member whose non-practicing children ignored her wishes for a Catholic funeral. My mom asked me, since both me and my two brothers are atheists, if we would respect their desire for a formal Catholic funeral. 

I said, yes, of course.

I didn't really think about it. I would assume that this is what they want. They have a lot of friends and there are other family members who would be mortified if a Catholic funeral did not happen. Now, since I don't believe in an afterlife, do I think it matters? No. Do I like the idea of giving money to the Catholic church and supporting them? No. But, I would be equally mortified if my parents forced a Catholic ceremony on ME, knowing that I don't believe in it. Again, I guess it doesn't matter since I don't think anything happens when we die. But I don't want that to be the last memory that the living have of me-- a completely wrong impression of who I was as a living person. Even though we're in our twenties, the life partner and I have discussed our last wishes with each other. We don't trust our parents to honor them.

What would you do in this situation? And if you don't believe in an afterlife, do you care what happens to your body when you die?

Avoiding Church With the Parents OR Religion at "Home"

I hope the decision isn't reversed!

One half of GOP is out of Los Angeles at the moment, and that half is me. Our most regular contributor. I'm in Iowa right now, feeling especially sad about the liberal Supreme Court justices getting booted out of a job. I just flipped through the local paper and saw a cute engagement photo for two men... I hope they still get to marry in the next year.

And speaking of weddings, that's why I was back in Iowa. One of my cousins was getting married! It was my kind of ceremony. One of their best friends became an officiant through the Universal Life Church (you can be atheist and register with them) and there was ZERO mention of a god or religion. It was short, sweet, and very personal. They had a focus on a eco-friendly reception, which was very cool.

The wedding was far enough away from where my parents live that they had a motel reserved for that evening. The next morning was Sunday. They were, of course, going to church. With my EXTREMELY religious grandmother. What was I going to do?

Relief came in the form of my cousin. Most of the younger crowd from the wedding planned to go out that evening for drinks, and I wanted to join in. My cousin offered to let me stay at her place and my parents agreed to pick me up from her apartment the following afternoon. THANK YOU! Win win. I got to hang out with my cousins a bit more and was saved from the awkwardness of Catholic mass.

My parents know that I am a non-believer. I don't think the word "atheist" has ever been uttered, but they know that I don't go to church and don't believe in many of its tenets. If I'm at home, they let me sleep in and don't harp about mass. Even at Christmas, and they've taken it considerably well. But if I were at a hotel that needed to be checked out of.... I would have been forced to go out of necessity unless I was stubborn enough to insist at being dropped off at a Starbucks. But that would have led to really uncomfortable discussions with my grandmother whose heart would be broken that I refuse to attend church.

Does this make me an atheistic coward or just a considerate person who doesn't want to crush the expectations of an 87 year old lady?

On another note: businesses close REALLY early on Sundays in Iowa. This is annoying. However, the cafe I tried to eat at gave me a free cup of coffee to go. That was nice. More on businesses and Sundays another day.

Back to Normal, Post Election

Election Day has come and gone and I was super psyched to walk down the street to our polling place, all prepared with my sample ballot filled out and at the ready for reference. Jerry Brown became our governor (again) and Barbara Boxer pulled through. Prop 19 died, surely to rise again. California now requires only a simple majority to pass the budget, but now a 2/3 vote is required for all fees and fines. But air pollution restrictions and standards remain progressive. Some of the saddest news for me was not that Republicans took control of the House (at least the Dems still have the Senate), but that Iowa citizens booted out 3 Supreme Court Justices who ruled in favor of same-sex marriage. What. A. Blow. Guess that proves that Iowa isn't quite as progressive as I'd like to think. *sigh*

The real sign that we're back to pre-election norms? This blog. We still have only two followers and our page views have returned to the normal 3 or 4 a day. Thank goodness. I don't know that I'm ready yet to have 300 to 500 views a day. But what that does demonstrate to me is that people are starved for information when it comes to certain issues. Like voting "yes" or "no" on judges! There was nothing else out there. What really surprised me was when another Blogger linked to OURS! This guy pretty much was doing what we were, posting the way that he and his girlfriend were going vote... but he referred to this site as a part of the "punditocracy." Not at all in a complimentary way, but me? A Pundit? A 24 year old, usually poor, white female living in an over-crowded and run-down apartment in Hollywood? Awesome. As a friend said, make me a sign and put it on my desk! Anyway, when I tackle issues like that in the future, I'm going to be even more thoroughly researched.

Now, however, I am happy to return to our usual atheist blog, protesting against infringements upon secularism, with a political slant. I don't think I'm ready for so much attention.

Christine O'Donnell is a Hack

I'm sure just about everyone has seen the video of Christine O'Donnell (R) in a debate with her opponent, Chris Coons. They're competing for Delaware's seat in the Senate.

I like the way Anderson Cooper breaks it down. She repeatedly asks, "Where in the First Amendment is the Separation of Church and State?" If one gave her the benefit of the doubt, she might have simply meant that those exact words aren't actually anywhere in the Constitution. This is true. But Article Six of the Constitution states that anyone running for office shall face "no religious test" and the First Amendment clearly states that "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof." And the Supreme Court over the years has clearly interpreted the First Amendment to mean "separation of church and state."

During the same debate, O'Donnell also didn't remember what the 14th (dealing with citizenship) and 16th (income tax) Amendments were, despite the fact that the Tea Party has made a big deal about these this year, going as far to call for their repeal. I mean, I don't know what each Amendment is without looking it up, but O'Donnell constantly invokes the Constitution as the basis for her opinions and claims to have studied Constitutional Government. Well, she obviously didn't study it very hard. What a dingbat.

This is so disturbing, because this is a right wing, über conservative, fundamentalist Christian who doesn't believe in Evolution and thinks "intelligent design" should be taught in schools. GAH! THIS is why political involvement is so important right now!  

If you care about SECULARISM, get out and VOTE!!!!

Sam Harris and Morality

Sam Harris was on 89.3 KPCC today promoting his new book, The Moral Landscape. He tries to argue that science can define morality based on assessing the effect of an action on the well-being and ability to flourish of humans and animals. He argues that we don't need God to tell right from wrong. He's been pushing the book like crazy. Sam Harris hasn't posted on his web page for ages and all of a sudden, BAM! Four posts in one day!

jurvetson/Flickr (cc by-nc-nd

Of course, I agree that we don't need a god or religion to tell right from wrong. Some would argue that I have a moral compass because my mother is religious and I was raised in a religious household. However, I do not believe in God now and follow no religion. The Bible is DEFINITELY not the basis of my morality. I definitely don't believe in slavery or the subjugation of women or stoning....so, you know, I DON'T believe the Bible or any other Holy Book is a good basis of morality. Certainly, there are people who do great harm and incredibly immoral things in the name of religion. So where's their moral compass? Clearly, the God Compass isn't working right in them!!

I follow a philosophy of "Do Least Harm." I try not to bring hurt or pain to others, and try to limit the hurt and pain I place upon our environment. I don't eat animals, I recycle... this is a part of my morality. I don't think that using fear of god or the threat of hell or the reward of heaven is a good basis of morality. This promotes IMMORAL behavior, I think... If you think you can be an asshole all of the time, but at the last minute go to confession or "find" Jesus, that's not very moral. So, you kill a person? No big deal! Repent, and all is forgiven! BULLSHIT. The victim's family will not forget and there will be plenty of people who won't forgive.

Occasionally, I'll consider doing something "immoral"... like, taking the $10 left in the self check-out machine. But, *sigh* I would want someone to turn it in if I forgot it, so I hand it over to the supervising cashier. Maybe he pocketed it, but that's on him. I'm an extremely honest person because I am extremely empathetic. How would I feel if I were in their place? I found another server's book, forgotten, left lying around and filled with money. Guess what? I returned it. Even though I didn't care for that person. I would hate it if that happened to me. Sometimes my morality is based on guilt, but not on God's... it's based on my mother. Sometimes her voice just pops up in my head.

The Sam Harris interview was interesting, but I don't know (based on this interview) that he made a strong argument for science as a basis for morality. I doubt that religious people who listened to it were particularly convinced. When the subject of promiscuity was brought up, I thought that I could have added more to the conversation.

Sam Harris argued that pair bonding and stable relationships are most fulfilling and conducive to well-being for most people, therefore there is an argument in its favor based on scientific studies. I would also argue that promiscuity puts one at a higher risk for STDs and emotional stress, therefore it isn't the best choice to make. I know that I would use these facts when discussing sexuality with my own children. But I also don't think that remaining a virgin until your wedding day is a moral/immoral choice. I think it's an unwise choice. Relationships last longer and are more successful if the partners involved are well matched sexually, so it makes sense to "test drive" (so to speak) before making long term commitments. And hey, six years of monogamy has worked for us and *GASP* we're atheists!

Tithing... stupid.

When I was a little kid, I dutifully saved my pennies each week to drop in the basket that was passed around church. I had visions of poor orphan children, shivering without coats, or starving kids with swollen bellies in African villages, and I imagined that my few coins went towards feeding and clothing the poor of the world. I was proud to drop in all that I owned.

I imagined myself to be like the cute little mouse from Robin Hood, giving up her last farthing to help with the poor. Fast forward to 3:14.

Then one day, our priest gave a homily on tithing. Tithing is the practice of giving some portion of your income, usually 10% to the church. I remember the priest emphasizing that this should be 10% of your income BEFORE taxes, BEFORE any other spending. I was flabbergasted. I asked my mom where my money went that I faithfully put into the baskets each week. When she told me it went to our church, I felt lied to. My mom actually said that she chose to give some portion of her income to our church, but most of her 10% actually went to various charities she believed in. That makes sense to me.

Tithing has existed for ages, dating waaaaaay back to Jesus time. Churches have always needed a way to guilt parishioners into giving them enough money to operate. I believe that donating to valuable non-profit organizations is important, but contributing to an organized religion doesn't seem like a charitable cause to me.

Writing about tithing seems like it should be a non-issue to me. After all, I don't belong to a religion. Why should I care? Well, I care about poor people being guilted into giving away their hard earned money to an organization that doesn't actually do any good for people. Why not take that 10% and give it to your local school or homeless shelter or Doctors Without Borders?

Plus, I thought I should write about tithing because it represents the very first crack in my faith as a small child. What was the first crack in your faith/belief in god or religion?

Can I pray for you?

I work as a restaurant server. Sad, but true.

Yesterday, I was working the lunch shift and waited on these two very sweet, but incredibly trying middle-aged women. I noticed them praying before they ate their bread and made sure not to disturb them. Later, after I answered their 9,000 questions and satisfied their inane requests and FINALLY took their order, one of the women says, "Now, my dear....we already prayed over our food, but we'll pray again when our meal comes. And I want to ask you, is there anything we can pray about for you?"

I'll take this kitten's prayers, thanks. He's cuter.

These are very nice women, otherwise, and I depend on their tip, so I just say, "That's very sweet of you, but I'm just fine, thank you. You don't need to pray for me."

"Are you sure? Any family we can pray for? You must have something!"

"No, ma'am, I'm just fine on prayers. But thank you so much for thinking of me." And I walk away.

I was hoping that would be the end of it, but NO! When I come back to check on them during their meal, I ask if everything is OK. Church lady says she has a big problem.

"Oh, no, I'm sorry, ma'am, what is it?"

"I am just so troubled. I can't believe there's nothing about which we can pray for you."

"Trust me, that's very sweet, but I've got two grandmas and a mother who I know are praying for me every day. I'm covered." That at least made them laugh.

"Ohhhhhh, are they Christian? What church do they go to?" (Now what the fuck difference would it make if my parents are Jewish, Muslim, Hindu or Buddhist? My family is Catholic, but I had a feeling that this lady wouldn't consider that Christian)

"My family is back in Iowa, actually..."

"OHHHHHHH.... Now how old are you? Are you in college or are you done with school? What are you doing in Los Angeles?" She bombards me with questions until she decides that she will pray that I have success in my career. Oddly enough, they assumed I was an actor even though I told them I was a writer (I'm tired of having that conversation EVERY day with customers).

Maybe I should have told her that I wrote a blog and that she should pray that I get more readers. Here's my point:  

What do you say when someone asks to pray for you?

Since I was at work, I had to be polite. What could I have said? Don't waste your time? What's the point? Do you really think you have a direct line of communication with an invisible, fictitious omnipotent being that has direct influence over your life and the lives of others? Are you so freaking special that your prayers mean more than the prayers of millions of others? Are you that narcissistic? I guess, in this case, that was true. These women also asked that I refrigerate and hold their leftover food until they got back from the movies. So, yeah.

The TEN COMMANDMENTS are a joke

A couple days ago a co-worker mentioned that they didn't understand why anyone would have an objection to the 10 Commandments being displayed somewhere. The obvious objection, I said, was separation of church and state. Secularists object to a religious text being on government/public grounds. "But there's nothing WRONG with the ten commandments!" she argued.

Oh, but there is! The first three or four commandments (depending on your religion) all have to do with honoring God. What a jealous and petty god! It needs a WHOLE day devoted to its holiness? Geez, how narcissistic! And besides, there's a whole lot of things that I find offensive that I would include on a list of Commandments that certainly don't make it on, mainly rape, sexual assault, and the exploitation of human beings in general. And slaves are okay, I just can't take them from my neighbor.

The Ten Commandments are also the perfect example of how self-contradictory, widely interpreted, and variously translated the Bible is. I don't understand how anyone can know anything about the Bible and view it as the WORD OF GOD when it is so clearly the convoluted WORD OF MAN. You don't need to be a Bible scholar to figure this one out either. Just look at the Wikipedia article on the Ten Commandments. There's a lot of variation.

Moreover, why are Christians so reverent about the Ten Commandments? If one claimed to be a follower of JESUS, wouldn't they hold the Beatitudes a little more holy? Of all religious sentiments, I definitely favor those over the Ten Commandments. Of course, those have contradicting versions (Matthew vs. Luke) just like everything else in the Bible.

But, in a violent power-hungry society, the Christian Right is never going to value things like the poor, the mourners, the hungry, the meek, the peacemakers, etc... Even though that's what their Holy Book tells them to value. Typical.

Here's my Commandment:

DON'T BE AN ASSHOLE!

FIRST GUEST POST! Boy Scouts and Atheism

 This post was submitted by our wonderful friend Zach, who lives in Chicago and will hopefully join us in L.A. someday. I'm very excited that I don't have to think as much this evening!

This is a story about a kid in my Scout troop. 

The Boy Scouts of America is relatively famous for its Scout Law.  A twelve point list of qualities that every scout is supposed to aspire to.  The final point of the Scout Law and the one I personally have found the most conflict with is "A Scout is Reverent."  I have not been a believer for probably about 13 years now and in that time I have risen through the ranks to Eagle Scout and joined my troop as a leader.  Through this exposure to scouts I have come to my own definition of reverence that works for me and which I was called to defend when I was reviewed for my Eagle Scout. 

Last April a young man was up for rank and facing a board of review, a common question on the board is to explain an aspect of the Scout Law as it pertains to you.  The young man (he is 13)  was asked to explain reverence.  He thought on the matter and said it didn't apply to him as he is an Atheist.  The board asked him to leave and ended up withholding their decision as to whether or not to grant him rank (I have never heard of this happening before).  The kid is a great scout. He is resourceful, an avid camper and outdoorsman, respectful and helpful.  He just doesn't believe in God. 

The matter was brought to the troop committee where several leaders suggested ejecting the young man from the troop outright and definitely denying him rank.  Several of these leaders were people that up until then I had nothing but respect for.  Ultimately, it was decided that at his age he could not have solidly decided on the matter and his merits as a scout and individual won the day. Despite this, several leaders still took it upon themselves to talk to this young man about how such exceptions might not be made in the future. 

Here's the thing.  A belief in God does not make one reverent nor does disbelief make one not reverent.  Here a young man has learned from this whole incident that he has to hide his beliefs in an organization that claims to support American values.  Reverence is (don't care what Webster says)  acknowledging and respecting that there are things in life greater than oneself and putting those things ahead of ones own desires.  Vegetarians have reverence for the lives of animals.  Soldiers have reverence for their country and its ideals.  Doctors Without Borders revere human life and health.  These are all people who can quite easily be atheist but live with reverence none the less. 

I am proudly still a member of the BSA.  It has done a lot of good for a lot of kids, myself included.  Seriously though, if it doesn't make a push to pull its head out of its ass on things like Atheism, Homosexuality and other social issues, it's going to risk becoming another completely irrelevant excuse for parents to pawn their kids off on other people for a weekend. 

Something to Cheer You Up

Life Partner and I were just commenting on how this clip brings us comfort and joy...



Thanks for existing, Douglas Adams.

Physics Proves THERE IS NO GOD!

OK, so I'm exaggerating. Theoretical Physics is, well, theoretical. But if the SMARTEST MAN IN THE WORLD says that "God" wasn't needed to form the Universe...

Then I'm thinking everyone should listen to the world's smartest man.

Stephen Hawking's newest book, "The Grand Design," states that the idea of a creator of the universe is redundant.

Because there is a law such as gravity, the universe can and will create itself from nothing. Spontaneous creation is the reason there is something rather than nothing, why the universe exists, why we exist. It is not necessary to invoke God to light the blue touch paper and set the universe going.

Thank you, Stephen Hawking. You were a hold out on rock solid atheism for a long time, always bordering on agnosticism. So, for this, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 

And as I warned in my previous post... Don't bother reading the user comments on news articles like this. They will just make you sad. People can believe in a God or witches or fairies or the Loch Ness Monster if it makes them happy. I just don't think it's a very logical or reasonable belief and I don't like it when wars are fought and people are oppressed over it.

According to this, I was Wise in Kindergarten

This has been bugging me for almost a year.

I pass by this congregation almost every day on my way home from work. It's in West Hollywood in a heavily Orthodox Jewish part of the city. For almost a year now, this sign has been bugging the heck out of me.

So, does this mean I was becoming wise at the ripe old age of FIVE? Because that's when this god character really started to spook me. He was like Santa Claus, only instead of deciding whether I got presents or coal, he decided whether I went to Heaven or HELL. Whether I got to hang out with angels in the clouds or be tormented by devils with pointy sticks in the eternal fire. To me, every little infraction was worth confession. When I received First Communion in the 2nd grade, my catechism teacher told us that if we prayed with our hands folded and fingers pointing down....we were pointing towards HELL! If we kneeled with our little butts rested against the pews... Baby Jesus would CRY!

I also started to worry as I got older that God/Jesus was some kind of pervert. If he was always watching... was he watching me in the shower???? Now, I understand that my childhood ideas of god and religion were...well... childish. But some people do interpret religion literally. 

But my real question is, why would anyone want to believe in a scary, vengeful god? Why not believe in the lovey-dovey all-is-forgiven, try-to-be-nice-to-everyone god? It seems like hypocrisy to only behave "morally" because you're scared shitless that your god will smite you. And what a terrible way to live anyway. If god is omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient... you should theoretically be OMNIFRIGHTENED! And that just doesn't seem very wise to me.