Thursday, August 19, 2010

Gay Marriage (and Life Partnership)

Please, PLEASE can this be legal now? 

I'm from Iowa, one of the swingiest states in the Union. You never can tell what those goofy Iowans are going to do and that goofy Iowa Supreme Court ruled in favor of gay marriage over a year ago.

I left Iowa for California in order to live in a more progressive state. To be around more liberal people like me. Hmmm... guess I was somewhat wrong. Just about everyone knows about Prop 8 (Prop Hate, as it's usually called in our house) and that millions of Californians enjoy voting to restrict the rights of others.

Luckily, the case went back to court and as the L.A. Times put it, "Prop 8 is Hanging by a Legal Thread." Right now, we're just waiting to on the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals to decide on the case.

At least a precedent has been set that even if this ruling is overturned in the future, that all those same-sex couples waiting to get married will have permanently legitimate marriages. If I were part of a lesbian partnership that missed the chance to get married before Prop 8... I'd be on pins and needles right now.

I think that same-sex marriage, more than almost any other issue, is a clear cut example of when God Obscures Perception. Why should anyone care if two gay people in a committed relationship receive the same benefits as a straight couple? No one is being harmed here. This isn't a threat to marriage. Divorce is a threat to marriage. The iPhone is a threat to marriage.

There are people out there who don't understand parody. Don't waste your time reading user comments.

My very Catholic mother has always been pretty iffy about gay marriage, even though she personally knows plenty of nice gay and lesbian couples. It took me explaining to her that no matter what the law said, they would never be able to force churches to marry same-sex couples. She was surprised. Why? I don't know. I thought that was rather obvious given all the restrictions the Catholic church already imposes on married couples (vowing to raise their children Catholic, pre-marriage counseling, etc...). But this actually satisfied her concerns! I explained that it was about tax laws, hospital visitation, insurance, and most importantly, equal recognition!

Actually, one of the many reasons that Life Partner and I aren't married yet is because the ugliness surrounding this debate has made marriage seem like some dirty, exclusive club... and we aren't sure that we want to be a part of that until same-sex marriage is safe in this state. I'm not judging those who care about this issue and still get married...I'm just saying that it feels wrong to us.

I can't claim to understand the discrimination the gay community faces, but I have felt it in a very small way. My life partner and I have been together for almost six years and act like any other young married couple. We live together, share expenses, have always been completely monogamous, consult each other on pretty much everything... we plan to spend our lives together and renew that promise almost every day. Yet, when I went to the doctor's office, there were boxes to check for single, married, divorced, widowed, and domestic partner. Well, in California, you can't be domestic partners unless you are a same-sex couple or one partner is older than 62. 

So what do I check?
Yeah, those kooky Iowans.

UPDATE! American Atheists to have 2011 convention in Iowa.... GAH!!!!! FOR REALSIES?!

1 comment:

  1. so i was just looking through old posts and how did we not establish that we are both from iowa??

    also i noticed my friends delilah and vicky leaving you comments. iowa atheists unite! (although i think vicky follows a religion, just not in the traditional christian sense)


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